drunkencynic's Diaryland Diary

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the male persuasion

Remember Paul? The really hot Californian I met on the beach? His email address is [email protected] Yeah. I'm not making this up.

What do I do to deserve these guys?

There must be someone normal out there. There must be.

On a more distressing note, I am plagued by JR again. Not by him, but more specifically, thoughts of him. I'm jealous of his 'someone'. I promised myself I never would be, but here I am. We went over and over how great our relationship is, how we'll never hate each other, how in twenty years we'll still be great friends who sleep together on off-relationship-seasons (or...not...:), how (I came up with this one) he's like the obligatory gay friend-- only we have sex, how it's so great that we don't have emotions and feeling and shit like that, how we care, but aren't romantically, passionately, emotionally attached, how we somehow have an even stronger bond because of how we are. But here I am.

Fuck.

9:30 p.m. - 2004-01-24

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