drunkencynic's Diaryland Diary


holidays are always fun with drunkencynic!

I am a bit of a failure at everything.

Heidi knows about JR and I, though how much she knows, I don't know. We both (separately, of course) assured her it was strictly platonic, which she seemed to accept, so that might be somewhat placating. I am quite sure that her level of hate for me is now somewhere around explosive, though.

I am radically redesigning my diet due to the pathetic fact that I am Once Again Sick. You might as well just tattoo that on my forehead, it seems to be permanent enough. My mom has for years been extolling the virtues of the Fit for Life diet. She says it stopped her allergies, and gave her more energy, kept her healthy, etc. At this point I'll try anyfuckingthing. I'm also cutting out dairy and sugar permanently. I mean it. Those two are my downfall. Sugar makes me sick and irritable, and dairy makes me phlegmy. Fun! Goddamnit, that means no more mint chocolate chip ice cream...I hate the universe.

But if I really want to sing, it has to be done. I can't just keep getting sick like this. I'm already right up against the deadline for an audition tape for the arts camp I was applying to. If my voice doesn't recover to a satisfactory level by tommorrow, and at the very latest, Friday, I'm so fucked it's not even funny. I wish I was a jazz singer. Those motherfuckers inhale cigarettes and whiskey while they're singing!
This cannot possibly be interesting you.

Valentine's Day is stupid. I mean it. Stupid stupid stupid. I even thought so when I had a boyfriend. I remember last year so well. He told me to dress up, he was taking me out. So I wore a nice dress and paid attention to my hair (hello, hair). Well, plans changed, Thomas was short on money (what a suprise), and what he was really doing was parking with me in his car in our old deserted fucking spot, so we could drink wine, eat cheese and crackers, and...guess what...fuck. "Happy Valentine's Day, honey, now that you're drunk, can I lecherously take advantage of you in unnatural ways where you've explicitly warned me not to?"

How romantic.

I'm too cynical for this sort of thing.

2:03 p.m. - 2004-02-10


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