drunkencynic's Diaryland Diary

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boy, why are you crying?

Apparently Britney Spears has gotten married. Now she can call herself a true party girl. Either that or she has a killer publicist.

Did I ever tell you about John? He works at the coffee shop. I've had a minor crush on him for a little while now. He's complimented me on my scribblings often, and likes to talk to me about art. He asks for my opinions, which is awesome, and thinks I'm actually talented. I disagree, but I definitely don't feel like correcting him. :)

Anyway, he asked me out today. I'm excited because I actually really like him, but unfortunately I'm not very physically attracted to him. A little, weirdly, but not a whole lot. But the whole 'intelligent, sensitive-but-not-in-a-dopey-cliche-way, sweet-as-hell' thing he's got going on is definitely a turn-on. Another hurdle to cross is reconciling my parents to the idea. Bleh. I'm so sick of this.

Elena and I went and saw Peter Pan. It was wonderful. Wonderful wonderful wonderful. I was beaming the whole time. I don't care what you have to say about it, if you don't like it, you suck. It has everything a movie should have: mermaids, pirates, sexual tension, Freudism, British humor, darkness, unabashed goofy special effects.

I also bought underwear. Which is big for me because I'm not a 'buying underwear' kind of girl. It's like my socks. I feel like I'm dressing up if I get them in packs less than twelve and not from Costco. I rarely buy single underwear, and even more rarely wear it. The last time I bought fancy underwear (okay, save the horrid lavender ones Thomas bought for me) was before Milo visited, over a year ago.

This is not just any underwear, either. Oh no. It's lacy, and black. Come on, now, everyone- ooooooooooh.

JR has always wanted me to buy fancy underwear for him. I've never understood it. The wrapping's not important, it's what inside, right? I've always been of the school of thought that once you're down to your skivvies you're pretty much in. Or, you know, the other way around. :) Why worry about your underwear at that point? JR says that that's the clincher. The sexy underwear has him looking forward to next time. Or something. I still don't get it but I bought some anyway and now he's being a dick and he may never see it.

I tried to get him to visit the heiau with me, but he squirmed out at the last minute again. He keeps insisting that we shouldn't see each other. He'd love to, but we shouldn't. Yeah, whatever. If you'd love to enough, you'd forget all your stupid reservations and just do it. Dumbass.

I HATE feeling unwanted. It makes me want to bug him even more, to solicit his attention, and bugging him is the last thing I should do.

I added our family Christmas card photo to my photo album. We almost look functional.

I would so fuck both Peter Pan and Captain Hook. At the same time, even.

11:46 p.m. - 2004-01-03

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