drunkencynic's Diaryland Diary


happy new year

So it's 2004.

What did I do last night? I watched Pirates of the Caribbean with my parents (who were ridiculing it and, even more annoyingly, badly predicting each plot twist), and fell asleep around 11:40.

What has this year been like? I guess I'd have to say I've changed a lot since last year. I was much more innocent then. Not physically, although somewhat, I guess you could say. But I hadn't been screwed over and you haven't really lived till you've been screwed over, right? Right.

JR sent me a text message after he read the email, saying he appreciated my honesty, 'you know my hangups', he needs to think, and he wants to talk to me tommorrow. Which would be, uh, today. I don't know what I expected. Actually, yes I do. I expected something like this. I didn't expect him to rush over, pick me up in his arms and proclaim his love for me. And in all honest truth, I would much prefer he thought about it long and hard. Mmm, long and hard...;)

But today I'm ready for an adventure. What I have in mind is visiting a heiau. A particular heiau. For those of you who don't know, a heiau is like a special place where the old Hawaiians sacrificed victims and things like that. This particular heiau is supposed to be hella-haunted. I've been wanting to go there for ages, and JR and I have planned to go together. So I text-messaged him today asking if he'd like to go but I'm guessing he's either sleeping, hungover, or otherwise occupied because he hasn't replied.

I tried calling Heidi yesterday to plan something for last night, but she didn't answer. Which freaked me out because JR told me the other day that she'd called him, threatening suicide one morning. I assumed the worst and tried to call JR to ask how she was. He didn't answer his phone either. So by now I'm assuming he's at the hospital watching Heidi slowly die from the painkillers she's ingested or the slits in her wrists. I start to really freak out. I drove to the coffee shop to steady myself, but it was closed. JR's car was there (he works in an office right above the coffee shop), so I went and saw him. He hedged for a while when I asked him about her, saying he hadn't seen her, then finally let slip that she'd called him, asking why I was calling her, and asking if she should call me back. It was a little disturbing. Heidi's never not wanted to talk to me. But apparently she's letting go of all ties or something. And she went on a date last night.

JR said once, "When Heidi gets a boyfriend I'll be relieved. When you get a boyfriend, I'll be jealous. Isn't that weird?"

Maybe she'll find happiness.

I want to go have fun! Argh.

10:28 a.m. - 2004-01-01


previous - next

latest entry

about me





random entry

other diaries: